Weed-Eaters in all their fury send grass hopping and flying about.
No bag have they to catch or digest their damp earthy cuttings,
so really there is no eating of weeds or grass happening at all.
It was foolish to name a mechanical tool as a consumer of organic produce,
should have called them Electric-Eating-Grass-Hoppers.
Now Grass-Hoppers, they eat weeds and grass.
The grass itself is not hopping, though I will give them their name,
they do hop from grass to weed and back again.
What we should have done, was call them Grass-Eaters.
Or better yet, Grass-Eating-Weed-Jumpers.
Not all Weed-Eaters are electric, some older more industrial models run off oil and gas.
This could change everything, we would have Oil-Gas-Industrial-Grass/Weed-Destroyers.
Grass-Hoppers almost have oil as well.
Pick one up and it vomits a dark brown oily substance from its mandibles.
As children we knew this as Tabasco-Sauce.
Now we have Oil-Puking-Grass-Eating-Weed-Saucers.
The best weed eaters and lawn mowers and cost practically nothing at all are horses, sheep, goats and cattle. And they don't puke Tabasco sauce although they drop "organic bombs," which are anyway good fertilizers. They not only keep the grass from growing wild; they are also very much on to consuming and then renewing.
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